How To Have Anal Sex After Giving Birth

It's widely known that women can have sex after childbirth — just not right away. However, depending on what kind of sex you were into pre-baby or interested in exploring after, there may be a few extra things to consider and precautions to take. Many couples might wonder how and when to have anal sex after giving birth. Is it safe? Is it done differently than before? Does it require certain accessories to help?

When can you have anal sex postpartum?

The good news is that postpartum anal sex is generally fine for you to do, but there are a few serious things to keep in mind. Before getting into how to have anal sex after giving birth, it's important to establish when to do it. "If you have had anal sex prior to pregnancy, you can safely resume anal sex again after six weeks," Dr. Sherry A. Ross, M.D., OB/GYN and author of She-ology: The Definitive Guide to Women’s Intimate Health, previously told Romper. "If it’s your first time exploring the back door, you may want to wait nine months until your body is recovered from nine months of pregnancy." How the delivery went may determine how long your body needs to heal.

During your six-week postpartum visit with a doctor or midwife, they will check to see if everything in your body is healing correctly following the pregnancy. “You could have tearing or an episiotomy [a surgical cut] following a vaginal birth, or maybe you just had major abdominal surgery for a C-section,” Kristin Sapienza, licensed physical therapist and founder of FemFirstHealth, tells Romper. “Basically, they’re checking for infection.” Having sex before things have fully healed can lead to the possibility of re-tearing, pain, and bleeding.

The six-week mark is a good gauge to see whether or not anal sex is safe. "The directive given to postpartum moms to wait six weeks to have sex usually applies to anal sex as well," Lamaze certified childbirth educator Deena Blumenfeld of Shining Light Prenatal Education, tells Romper. "The entire pelvic floor is stretched during birth. We need time to heal postpartum."

Blumenfeld suggests all new moms wait until their uterus goes back to pre-pregnancy size and the lochia (bleeding or discharge) stops before having sex. Blumenfeld stresses that you don't want to introduce infection or cause pain, so it's important to pause for those two things before engaging in anything sexual, including anal sex, after giving birth.

Another thing you may want to watch out for are hemorrhoids, which are swollen veins that visibly pop out in the anus, explains Sapienza. “Usually, the hemorrhoids develop from the extra pressure and from consistent constipation, and they tend to be very itchy or very painful and can bleed,” she says.

These pesky bum bandits can crop up during pregnancy and really put a damper on things temporarily. "Many women experience hemorrhoids after birth,” Blumenfeld says. “Anal sex with hemorrhoids can be very painful and cause bleeding.”

If anal sex is something you want to get into after childbirth, that's totally cool — just ask your doctor at your six-week visit to make sure you're physically healed first. And even if you are, listen to your body. “To be honest, for a lot of women, they're cleared to do everything, but they don't feel that they're ready to be intimate,” says Sapienza.

If you’re unsure, be open with your partner about it and go at your own pace. “I recommend touching the area during foreplay first,” Sapienza says. “If it's already painful to the touch, then they should see a pelvic floor therapist.”

What you’ll need

If you are cleared and feeling ready for postpartum anal sex, Blumenfeld recommends to “go slow and use lots of lube.” When getting back into having sex with your partner, easing into things and being gentle with yourself are key for any new mom.

Sex, no matter how you do it, should be mutually pleasurable. If it's not, there may need to be more healing or some adjustments to positions. If you're in an open and honest relationship, you should be able to express these things to your partner and have them respond empathetically, lovingly, and appropriately. And if you feel pain, advocate for yourself and make a visit with a pelvic floor therapist.

Expert:

Dr. Sherry A. Ross, M.D., OB/GYN and author of She-ology: The Definitive Guide to Women’s Intimate Health

Sources interviewed:

Kristin Sapienza, PT, DPT, founder of FemFirstHealth

Deena Blumenfeld, Lamaze certified childbirth educator and founder of Shining Light Prenatal Education