New Mom Sparked A Viral Convo On Reddit About The "5-5-5 Rule" For Postpartum Recovery

A new mom has sparked a viral conversation on Reddit for setting some pretty firm boundaries after giving birth to her second child. She decided to follow the “5-5-5” rule, no matter how much her husband complained, and most folks on Reddit are in her corner.

The 26-year-old woman explained in a recent Reddit post that she wanted to follow a specific plan for postpartum recovery. “With my first and this pregnancy I made it clear to my husband I wanted to follow the 5-5-5 rule,” she wrote. “He seemed to drag his feet but because he wanted kids more than I did he agreed.”

The mom went on to explain what this 5-5-5 rule means. “First five days ‘In bed.’ Nothing but skin to skin with my daughter, breastfeeding, and resting. Next five days ‘on bed,’” noting that this would entail, “Sitting up, still breastfeeding, cuddling with baby, doing homework with my son, crossword puzzles etc.” For her final five days, the mom of two wrote, she planned to spend most of her time “resting but doing light chores, folding laundry, diaper changing, just not standing for more than 30 minutes. All while still, cuddling with baby, breastfeeding baby, doing homework with my son and coloring.”

The 5-5-5 rule has become a popular plan to rest and recover postpartum for new moms, both physically and mentally. Perhaps especially when there is an older child involved who might also need care and extra one-on-one time with their mom. This Redditor’s husband might have initially agreed to this rule, but eventually cracked under the pressure.

“Today he came to me crying saying it was all too much and he couldn’t do this by himself. I reminded him that he agreed to it and I have to go back to work shortly after the 5-5-5 is up,” she explained, adding that the family was well prepared for her postpartum recovery. “Our son (5) has started acting out at home due to the stress of the new baby and lack of sleep, we’ve offered him going to my parents next door and he seems interested. We’ve prepared a months worth of freezer meals so for dinner all he has to do is throw the DISPOSABLE tin in the oven and walk away for a few hours.” He also needs to feed and walk the family dog.

With all of that in mind, she stuck to her plan, and asked folks on Reddit if she was being an a**hole for it. Many people were on her side.

“I assume all the stuff that he’s crying about is the stuff that you are going to be expected to do on an ongoing basis after you return to work?” wrote one person, and she replied that was correct.

“Husband insists on having another child, then complains when it’s hard to look after a newborn and other child. He knew what he was getting into. He agreed to it,” wrote another.

Still, there were a lot of people who thought the new mom was asking for too much and being unkind. One Reddit user had a response for that, saying she was in the right “especially as all he’s doing is some extra chores for only two weeks and one day. I am surprised about the amount of YTAs in the comments but how dare women take time to recover from pushing out a human being. Especially since you'll be taking on those chores and going to work after this period, it sounds like you need this time dearly. If he can’t handle the chores alone, maybe if anything he should appreciate all you do especially if when you get back to a normal routine all he takes care of normally is the dog.”

Every new mom is entitled to set her own boundaries. And this new mom could not have been clearer.