I must admit, before my son was born, I bought into the idea that my sex life after having a baby would...well, it just wouldn't. I worried my desire and ability to get down would cease to exist once I became a mother. Even as my due date neared, I was afraid that I would never have the hot, passionate sex I once had. You know, the kind of sex that gave me the baby in the first place. Thankfully, I and many others like myself, were mistaken in this belief ("baseless fear" would be a more accurate way to describe it) that the arrival of a baby meant the departure of a killer sex life. Sure, things have changed and yes, having an active, hot sex life requires more work and effort and conscious thought when you have a child as opposed to when you didn't, but having a baby has also made the sex I'm having even hotter than it was before.
No, this is not me lying to myself to make myself feel better about how having a child has ravaged my existence and eradicated all fun. It's true: My sex life is off the charts now. Now that I have a little kid in the house, if my partner and I want to get down, we have to sneak and hurry and be quiet and sometimes do it on the kitchen counter in the middle of the day and you know what? That's super hot.
So, if you're about to have a baby, thinking about having a baby, or just had a baby and you're completely convinced your vagina will never be a source of pleasure and fulfillment ever again, just take a look at a few of the reasons why having sex after baby — and especially when baby is sleeping — is possibly the most incredible sex you've ever had.
It Feels *Just* A Little Forbidden
Maybe it's because society de-sexualizes mothers, or maybe it's because having sex when a baby is asleep in another room (or the same room; I don't know your sleeping arrangements) is seen as "weird" by some people, but enjoying a blinding orgasm when you're a parent feels somehow illicit, even if you're doing it by yourself or with someone you've been married to for 10 years. Suddenly, you're back in high school again, trying not to get caught by fearful parents, or you're back in college again, trying not to wake your roommate (or, um, the entire floor of your dorm).
A Hand Over Your Mouth Can Be Hot
Trying not to make any noise can be, well, super hot. When partners are putting their hands over each other's mouths (consensually, of course) and trying to get one another off while still trying to keep one another quiet, well, the juxtaposition only intensifies the experience.
You Have To Be Quick
Sometimes foreplay is great, but sometimes it just seems tedious. Like, get to business, buddy. When you're attempting to score a sex session during a baby's nap, time is of the essence. You don't have time to slowly ease into it — pants off and let's do this thing! The sense of urgency can make for one hot session of sexy time.
You Get To Have Sex In Different Places
Trying not to wake the baby during sex can sometimes mean the bedroom is off limits. This gives you and your partner free range to turn your entire home into a potential sex spot. A dryer, a kitchen table, a living room floor, a dryer, a couch; they're all potential places where you can get down and dirty without waking the oblivious baby in his or her crib.
You Have Sex At Any Time Of The Day
When baby naps, it's go time... And that baby naps (hopefully) multiple times during the day if you know what I mean. This means you can have morning sex, or after-breakfast sex, or before-lunch sex, or afternoon sex, or pre-dinner sex or all of the above, you little go-getter. Sure, your schedule is being held hostage by a tiny human who does nothing but poop and spit up, and yes, you will want to sleep yourself, but if you can get creative with the time allotted, your sex life can be even better than before.
You Feel Like You Just Won A Secret Prize
There's something about pulling off hot sex while the baby sleeps (and then once you and your partner are finished, enjoying a cup of water and a few post-orgasm moments together while the baby continues to sleep) that makes you feel like you can do anything. Even if it is for just a brief, fleeting moment, you're convinced that you have this entire parenting thing completely figured out. I mean, you just pulled off nap time and an orgasm. What is it that you can't do?!
You Feel Closer To Your Partner
Sex after baby isn't just about getting off (although, yes, that's a big part, because hello, awesome endorphins that make everything feel better), it's also about feeling connected to your partner. A baby can be taxing and exhausting and time-consuming, and sometimes that leaves little to no time for you and your partner to feel like yourselves. So when you pull off sex while the baby sleeps, you two feel like a team that can tackle the world. Or, you know, at least an orgasm.
Images: Alejandra Quiroz/Unsplash; Giphy (7)
