Life

9 Places To Masturbate, Because The Bedroom Can Get Boring

by Britni de la Cretaz

If you’re anything like me, your masturbation routine is pretty, well, routine. I have a standard time and place when I know I’m alone, and I’m pretty goal oriented about the whole thing. There’s not much romance or seduction involved and I hardly ever leave the comfort (and convenience) of my bed. And while sticking to your bedroom might be safe, there are a lot of other much more exciting places to masturbate.

How do I know? Well, when I was younger, I was much more adventurous about where and when I masturbated. There was something about the excitement of sneaking of somewhere a little less private to "feel myself," and I miss that thrill.

What makes a location ideal for self-pleasuring? Usually some sort of relative privacy — though the fear of being caught is exciting. It’s also important to keep consent in mind and make sure you’re not going to accidentally surprise someone who doesn’t want to see you getting off (not to mention it could be criminal in some situations.) Somewhere safe from the prying and nosy eyes of your little ones is always good too, though not necessarily easy to come by. Although it may take a little more thought and planning, spicing up your self-love routine by switching up the scenery is totally possible. So next time you're in the mood, why not test out a new location.

1The Bathtub

This one is an age old favorite, and with good reason. Since you’re already naked and in a private place, you can easily light candles and seduce yourself if you want, too. Bring in a waterproof vibe or get an assist from your shower head and you’ll get out of the tub feeling refreshed on several levels.

2Your Desk

Sex toy reviewer and blogger Epiphora writes a Jack Off Journal, in which she chronicles her masturbation sessions. Many of these sessions take place while sitting at her computer because — you guessed it — the porn is way more accessible there.

3Your Parked Car

Make sure you’re out of sight of other vehicles, because the last thing you want is to be arrested for public masturbation. But if you live with lots of other people, sometimes you have no choice but to retreat to the mini van to rub one out.

4A Public Bathroom Stall

Maggie Gyllenhaal’s character did it in the movie Secretary, so why can't you? Sometimes the urge hits, and you may not be able to wait. Plus, there’s something exciting about someone potentially hearing you.

5The Couch

Another place that visual aids can be easily viewable, this is best when you live alone or your roommates are gone (or if you’re hoping a partner might walk in and catch you.)

6Your Partner’s House

There’s something naughty about jerking off at someone else’s house that feels exciting and illicit.

7While Reading A Book

Books are hot. Even Toni Morrison can provide good masturbation material. Though Fifty Shades of Grey maybe not so much.

8The Great Outdoors

If you find somewhere quiet and secluded, it’s nice to switch up the scenery every now and again, even if you have to pick sand or twigs out of your creases when you're done.

9The Laundry Room

I’ve heard rumors about the vibrations produced by dryers — maybe you should determine whether there’s any truth to them.

Images: Forgiss/Fotolia; Giphy (9), c