11 Ways Being A Mom Of Two Is Actually *Easier*

A downside to having even one kid means that you don't always get to do the things you'd like to. Going out with friends, last minute plans, and big vacations are all difficult to facilitate. But it also means that you have a socially accepted "good reason" not to do those things if you don't want to, which can be pretty sweet. When you have one kid, though, sometimes people will still push you, but with two? You're mostly in the clear.

"Oh! You have a seven hour long improv show? I'd love to come but... kids!"

"You know I wish I could volunteer at your event, but with the two kids I just wouldn't be able to really be much use."

The price tag on baby number one can be jarring, simply because there's so much stuff and you kind of need it all. But when baby number two rolls around, there's a good chance that you can reuse a lot of the crap you purchased for number one, especially big ticket items like cribs, strollers, and swings. Depending on expiration dates you may even be able to reuse car seats (yeah, they have expiration dates but don't worry, they're good for a while). Point is, it's really nice to feel like you're getting your money's worth as that "cost per use" goes ever downward. It's deeply satisfying.

Not only are the cute in and of themselves, but when you put them together and you can see them interact? OMFG. It's a cuteness overload (especially when you're still working with those postpartum hormones where everything makes you cry — this is a good kind of cry). I cannot stress just how much that cuteness is going to get you through the tough times. Because, let's be real: two kids is generally harder, but the cuteness really lets you take that in stride and enjoy yourself.

The first time this happened I was genuinely impressed. My younger child was babbling about something. I could understand each of the words but the way she was stringing them together made absolutely no sense whatsoever. Then son stepped in and calmly explained to me what she meant. I was like, "Oh wow! You speak baby? That's convenient!"

Maybe it's because they're closer to the baby years than we are, or maybe they have lots of secret conversations we don't see that enables them to get one another in a uniquely kid way, but siblings are often on the same wavelength — a wavelength adults cannot access.

Yes, it does take a while to get to this level, but once you're there? Holy hell, it's so amazing. This past Saturday my husband and I actually sat on our couch reading while the kids played together in their room. Like... what is the witchcraft?! I never thought there would be a time when the sound of relative quiet from my children's general direction would be anything other than ominous.

But nowadays they're just doing their thing. It's glorious.

If you're in a family of three, a two to one vote (what movie we should watch, where we should go for dinner, etc) can be a hard sell for the one person outvoted. But a three to one vote when you're a family of four? There's no fighting that. So if you can get both parents and a child on board (or, on occasion, two kids and parent, as was the case when my husband said the day after Thanksgiving was "too early" for Christmas decorations and my kids and I were hearing none of that) that fourth domino is going to fall much more easily.

Before his sister came along, my son was pretty accustomed to being catered to. He wasn't spoiled, but, being the only child, he was our sole focus (family-wise) and there was no one around to say they didn't want to play with this toy or go to this specific playground.

As our daughter got older and had more opinions of her own, our son had to learn how to compromise and adjust to the fact that, sometimes, you don't always get your own way. Our daughter, on the other hand, grew up learning when to assert herself and when to back off — negotiating this sort of thing is second nature to her because she's never known any other way. It's been great for everyone involved.

As a parent, I feel like there are some decisions you can teeter-totter on and sometimes the addition of another kid can make those decisions easier by pushing you more firmly in one direction over the other. For example, maybe you were thinking about getting a bigger car when you had one kid but couldn't necessarily justify the expense. The addition of another child could easily push you to make that decision.

You'd think that two parents to one kid would be easier, but, honestly, I found it was actually simple to fall into the "I thought you had the baby" trap that way. But when there's two kids and two parents you're both running a man-to-man defense.

With kid number one you're going to make so many mistakes. So many. And you're going to look back on them and cringe or laugh or laugh while cringing. When you have that second child, well, you're still going to make some mistakes (because you're a human) but you can avoid a lot of the ones you made the first time around and there's a real catharsis that goes along with that. It's great. You realize you've learned something and you're capable of growth and even when it doesn't feel like it, you've got this whole parenting thing down.

With two kids, even years of sleep deprivation has a silver lining.