Life

Pregnancy Farts & 9 Gross Things You May Experience For The Sake Of Birthing Another Human

by Maggie May Ethridge

One of grossest (and also, funniest) things to happen to me occurred during my pregnancy. I’ll spare you the gory details, but in summary it involved terrible bronchitis, my husband, and a soaking wet Maxi pad that went flying out of my underwear. Needless to say, I was definitely a little freaked out to realize the gross things you experience during pregnancy. Of course, it isn’t a total shock. After all, your body is undergoing some major alterations. Between the squished organs, raging hormones, and growing body, you’re bound to encounter a few less-than-pleasant scenarios.

Your doctor probably won’t warn you about the unpleasant aspects of pregnancy, because to them, these things are totally normal and not a big deal. Sure, a fart that breaks the sound barrier will startle you, but it won’t be of any concern to your doc. (Of course, anything that gets extreme or painful warrants mention to your OB-GYN.) Still, it may comfort you to know that you aren’t alone in your pee stained, fart smelling, drool covered world. Here are some of the grossest, but not totally horrific things that happen to your body will betray you when you’re carrying a baby.

1You Will Pee Yourself

It’s often the first time they pee themselves that a pregnant woman realizes her life has changed and there’s no going back. Just because peeing yourself when you’re preggo is normal doesn’t mean it feels normal! But Baby Center noted that it's totally normal, as the hormonal changes affect your kidneys and your baby is pushing on your bladder. I took to wearing slim-fit pads to avoid a soaked crotch, and I suggest you do the same.

2You Have Excess Discharge

You know how your hormones make you wetter than normal when your ovulating? Welp, Parents pointed out that vaginal discharge is even worse when you’re pregnant. You might find that your underwear is regularly wet, or that your partner notices things are wetter during oral sex. No harm, no foul. Unless the odor is foul, in which case you should see your OB-GYN because you may have an infection.

3You Sweat Like A Hog

No body part is safe from sweat during pregnancy. This really common, off-putting pregnancy symptom is due to excess fluid and hormonal and metabolic changes, according to The Bump. To keep cool and avoid the extra glow, I wore a lot of thin cotton clothing and carried cold water everywhere.

4You Drool

Notice a little extra drool on your pillow? You’re not alone. Welcome to the saliva factory of reproduction! Doctors are unsure why this occurs, but What To Expect beleives hormones are thought to the a possible culprit. As much as you want to stop wiping your mouth, it’s important to know that excess saliva has some benefits, like producing protective enzymes that keep your gum and teeth healthy.

5You Fart A Lot

As your belly expands to make room for baby, your organs have to go somewhere. As written on The Bump, your body releases hormones to make the muscles more flexible, and those hormones cause your digestive tract to move slower, which causes more gas. Eat less beans, and try to have a really good sense of humor about it. Or, you can take the high road and blame your SO or the dog.

6You Grow Some Facial Hair

Finding a long blonde hair hanging off my face during the third trimester was not one of the highlights of that time. While there isn’t research proving why some women experience facial hair growth during pregnancy, you should take comfort in the fact that Drew Barrymore grew a pregnancy beard and she turned out fine.

7You Feel Queezy

Feeling nauseas and throwing up are so common during pregnancies that it’s a constant cultural joke (think Katherine Heigl suddenly puking on-air in Knocked Up.) In real life, it’s a lot less humorous. To cope, May Clinic reminds you that puking can be a sign for a healthy pregnancy and saltines can cure any upset stomach.

8Your Nipple Change

The Bump noted that larger, darker nipples can be the first sign of a pregnancy (it was for me.) This is your body’s way of revving up for baby, as the excess hormones can cause bumps called Montgomery's tubercles, which appear on your areolas and secrete oil to lubricate your nipples for breastfeeding.

9Acne, Skin Tags, and Purple Lines

March of Dimes wrote that there are plenty of skin changes during pregnancy from skin tags to enlarged veins to stretch marks and more. Many of these changes fades after the birth of your baby, so hang in there and, when all else fails, use concealer.

Images: akeeris/Fotolia; Giphy (9)