The Lice Etiquette Guide For Parents

The school year is officially in full swing and you know what that means: it’s only a matter of time before you get a notification that someone in your child’s class has lice. The only thing worse than receiving that letter? Knowing that your kid is the one with lice. But when it comes to “what to do when your child has lice,” the proper etiquette can feel a bit murky. What exactly are we supposed to do? No one should have to nitpick these important details alone (we couldn’t resist), so we’ve put together a head lice etiquette guide to help you out.

Know the facts about lice.

The minute you see one of those little creepy crawlies on your kiddo’s head (or just see them scratching their scalp more than usual), it can be easy to panic spiral. We know this is hard reaction to control, but try not to panic. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, lice are indeed parasitic (they drink your blood) but are not known to spread disease. In other words, they’re less a public health crisis than they are itchy and annoying. If you don’t see the bugs, other symptoms that can indicate you or your child might have them include

• Tickling feeling of something moving in the hair
• Itching (which is an allergic reaction to the bites on the scalp)
• Irritability and difficulty sleeping, since lice are most active in the dark... just like vampires.
• Sores on the head caused by scratching, which can become infected.

Lice are most commonly spread via head-to-head contact, which is why we most commonly see it among young children, who tend to have more close-contact, physical play than older kids and adults.

Know the myths about lice.

There’s a lot of misinformation out there about how one gets lice in the first place. Often these myths can sound extremely reasonable. Like...

• “Lice is a sign of poor hygiene, so you probably should have bathed more.”
• “You probably got lice from the dog; dogs get all kinds of parasites.”
• “You shouldn’t have tried on that hat in the store; that’s how you get lice.”
• “Little Emily next door has lice, they probably jumped from her scalp to my child’s when they were talking the other day.”

But contrary to popular belief, lice are not caused by poor hygiene, the family pet, or sharing headgear, clothes, or even a certain amount of space.

Getting lice has nothing to do with how dirty or clean someone is — if anything, it seems lice prefer clean hair, according to Lice Clinics of America. Moreover, the different varieties of lice are species specific. In other words, the lice that affect us humans aren’t interested in our pets’ blood and vice versa. As for getting lice from swapping hats or hoodies? It’s not impossible, says Lice Clinics of America, but it’s pretty rare since lice can’t live for very long away from a scalp and therefore don’t travel well.

And finally, lice don’t jump, Johns Hopkins assures us; they can’t even hop. (They also don’t fly.) So if your child was merely near someone who turned out to have lice, unless they were getting in one another’s space, don’t fret, as it’s unlikely the lice would spread.

“Can you send your kid to school with lice?”

If you notice that your child has a few creepy crawlies in their hair as they’re getting ready for school, it’s a good idea to take the time then and there to get them treated before sending them to the classroom if you can. However, believe it or not, the CDC says that if lice is discovered at school, there’s no need to pull them out early; it can wait until they (or you) get home for the day. So, in short, treat your kid for lice ASAP, but special emphasis on “as possible.” Don’t dawdle, but don’t panic if it takes you a couple hours to get to it. (It’s lice, not a time bomb you need to defuse.)

You can either treat them yourself at home with an over-the-counter or prescription pediculicides, which is a fancy way of saying “medication that kills lice.” After treatment, go through your child’s head with a fine tooth comb (most medications will come with one custom-made for the task of nitpicking) and remove any insects and nits (eggs). Depending on the length of your child’s hair, this will take a bare minimum of 15 minutes and could take hours.

You could also bring them to a lice clinic where professionals will do all the work for you. They’re not cheap, but they get results.

As for your house, no need to hire professionals there. Remember, lice just can’t live without us (specifically, without our sweet, sweet scalp blood). All you really need to do is wash any sheets, towels, or clothes that have been in use with hot water; give your living area a thorough vacuuming; and bag up non-washable items like stuffed animals or dry-clean only items in a plastic bag for two to three days.

“Should you contact the school if a child has lice?”

What about their day care director? In short, it can’t hurt. Don’t worry, your kiddo isn’t going to be outed as the Cootie Queen of first grade/day care/wherever they spend most of their time. The nurse or director will take this information and let other kids in the class know to be on the look out for lice and nits without naming names. It’s the best way to make sure other kiddos who’ve been up close and personal with your child can treatment ASAP if necessary.

If your child’s school doesn’t have a school nurse on staff, go ahead and contact their teacher and ask the best way to get the word out. They might be able to do so directly or they may direct you to the main office.

“Should you call your child’s friends if your child has lice?”

Of course school isn’t the only spot your child has been known to hang out. Maybe there was a team huddle at the soccer game on Saturday, or particularly vigorous sparring at karate. If their activity involved physical contact or likely physical contact, get in touch with the coach or instructor so they can be in touch with other families in the class — they likely have a more direct line of communication to everyone than you do, and they can do it anonymously.

If your child has recently spent the day at cousin’s house or a friend’s sleepover aka where it’s likely that they’ve been in close contact with one another, we’re sorry to say that it’s up to you to make that call.

But no need to frantically call everyone your kid passed on the street or anything like that. If they weren’t in a position to be close enough to touch heads then they other kids are likely louse-free and don’t need to worry.

“Can you send your child to school if they have nits?”

While some schools have a “No Nits” policy for having a kid return to class, the CDC, American Academy of Pediatrics, and the National Association of School Nurses have spoken out against this policy, noting that, especially after treatment, nits are so adhered to the hair that the likelihood of them spreading from child to child is very slim. Moreover, the risk of spreading lice via nits (many of which aren’t even viable) is less seriousness than the consequences of absenteeism, especially if nits last for longer than a day (which they almost certainly will).

In other words, we’re not telling you to ignore your school’s “no nit” policy, but we are saying that leading medical bodies say it’s a bad policy so...

Don’t be embarrassed or embarrass other people.

Lice aren’t fun, but they’re nothing to be ashamed of: the Cleveland Clinic suggests that up to 12 million 3- to 11-year-olds get lice a year — that’s a lot! If someone in your family has lice, try not to take it as some sort of moral or hygienic failing: it’s just one of those things that can happen to anyone.

And if you know someone whose kid has lice, remember that there’s no need to make this a thing. Take your own precautions and keep it to yourself.