What Moms In Other Countries Really Think About Guns In America

Whenever there is a mass shooting in America — and there have been 520 already this year — it seems that, along with thoughts and prayers, “it doesn’t have to be this way,” is another phrase that’s made it into the wheel of predictable responses.

Imagine it, though, really. What if you didn’t have to worry about gun violence? To be a parent is to worry, but what if this one particular worry were lifted?

Many of us have lived in the U.S. our whole lives, and do not remember a time before mass shootings were a simmering threat in our day-to-day life. An accepted risk of living in the world, right along with car accidents and catching the flu. But gun violence has been getting worse and in 2020, firearm-related injuries became the leading cause of death for kids ages 1 to 19, and a recent report found that pediatric firearm deaths rates are only getting worse, post-pandemic.

It doesn’t have to be this way. And it isn’t for many parents around the world. Their kids don’t have active shooter drills in school. Their high schoolers aren’t organizing vigils for lost friends. They don’t have to ask other families before a playdate if there is a gun in the house. They don’t furtively check the exits in movie theaters, wondering if they’d have enough time to get out if someone with a gun chose that day to wreak havoc.

We spoke to mothers in so-called “peer countries” to find out what they think and feel when they hear about the very real threat of gun violence that American families live with. In an effort to broaden our sense of possibility — for our children, and ourselves — we wanted to hear what it really feels like to live without the constant threat of gun violence, from moms who live largely without it. Below, seven parents from around the world share their perspectives.

Brooke Le Poer Trench, mother of three, ages 14, 12, and 8, in Sydney, Australia

Is gun violence something you worry about where you live?

My children have attended schools in London and Sydney, and I have never worried about gun violence. I know that this is a privilege of living in Australia. In fact, gun violence is rarely even in the news here, which is probably why it’s not even on my radar as something to worry about.

What do you think about when you hear about school shootings in America?

I just cannot wrap my mind around the fear and trauma for everyone whose life this touches. I can’t imagine dropping my child at school and worrying about their safety at this level. I just can’t understand why the U.S. government on both sides of the aisle isn’t doing everything in their power to make the U.S. safer for everyone. Especially children. Whose interests are worth protecting over and above the safety of children and all the people harmed by gun violence? In Australia, we did have a tragic mass shooting in Tasmania in 1996 at a tourist spot, which sparked massive gun reform. Within 12 days of the shooting, the government had agreed to change gun laws. Four months later, they came into effect and remain in place. In fact, they are even stricter now.

What do you think American moms worry about that you don't?

American mothers must worry so much about the safety of their children. They must lose sleep over the mental health of their children, who have to live with this constant hum of potential danger. With how challenging it is to be a mom, I can’t imagine having this added level of stress.

Do you think your children are safer than ours?

Children in Australia are safer than children in America in this one way. We have all the other pressures — the impact of social media on mental health, drugs, household pressures from financial stress, domestic violence, and other tensions. But gun violence? No, our children do not have that to worry about.

Christine, mother of one child, age 4, in Monterosso Al Mare, Italy

Is gun violence something you worry about where you live?

No. I absolutely do not worry about gun violence. In my tiny town, people own guns for hunting. Guns are kept at homes in Italy, but not thought of as something for protection. If you want to protect your home here, you get a big dog.

What do you think about when you hear about school shootings in America?

It’s horrifying. Being a mom is hard enough, the idea that sending my child to school or a movie or a shopping mall could cost them their life is just terrifying. It disgusts and horrifies me that this keeps happening.

Do you think your children are safer than ours?

Unfortunately, yes. There are lots of upsides to raising kids in America, but I am so relieved I do not have to worry about my kid getting shot.

Ida Svendsen, a mother of four, ages 10, 7, 5 and 9 months, in Tromso, Norway

As a parent, is gun violence something you worry about where you live?

No. School shootings are so far from my reality here in Norway, so it has never crossed my mind as something that can happen. I have a deep trust for the community and people. And of course safety in the strict gun regulations we have.

What do you think about when you hear about school shootings in America?

I get horrified each time I hear and read about it, because it is so far from my worries in life. I think about the families involved and the system in America. I often ask myself why are our countries so different!? I get sad, and I try to imagine myself being in that situation, ending up with no clear solution.

What do you think American moms worry about that you don't?

It is a hard question. I think they worry about who they can trust in relation to their kids at school.

Do you think your children are safer than ours?

Yes, I do. And it feels so strange to say that. I live in the largest town in Northern Norway, and I think that my four children have a very safe life here. I feel the government works to ensure that you are safe and well in Norway, and I feel very strongly that all people should live like that.

A mom of one child, age 16, in Singapore

Is gun violence something you worry about where you live?

No, it's not something I worry about at all. There have been a few knifing incidents in Japan, though, and that's been a concern.

What do you think about when you hear about school shootings in America?

It terrifies me every time I see it in the news. It seems to happen so often and so randomly, and the number of victims can be so high.

What do you think American moms worry about that you don't?

I think the things we worry about are pretty much the same, actually. But maybe we have a sense that the environment that we live in here is safer. In Singapore, I don't get too worried about my daughter taking public transportation on her own past 9 pm.

Do you think your children are safer than ours?

Yes.

Alethea Brown, mother of one child, age 8 in Tepoztlán, Mexico

What do you think about when you hear about school shootings in America?

I think Congress needs to stand up to the NRA. The system is broken. Gun violence is usually targeted here, at politicians, cartels. Assassinations happen in public places but they are targeted. There are parts of Mexico that are more dangerous than others. It's important to have situational awareness at all times. But no, gun violence is not something I worry about as a parent.

What do you think American moms worry about that you don't?

Everything. The culture here is more family-centric. Family matters more than work or money here. The common saying is “no te preocupes (or NTP).” It means, “whatever is wrong, we can fix it. I will help you.” I love that multiple generations live together in one house here. Grandparents or other family look after the babies while the parents are at work. Or parents often bring their kids to work. It is common and not frowned upon.

Do you think your children are safer than ours?

Yes.

Karni Arieli, a mom of two in Bristol, England

As a parent, is gun violence something you worry about where you live?

No. We feel safe in Bristol. I grew up in Israel, I know what guns mean. I have held one, shot with one, seen what it can do. Therefore, we have a strict no toy gun rule in the house for kids. I can’t imagine how hard it must be sending your kids to school with such fear and danger. It’s an impossible situation. Something has to change.

What do you think about when you hear about school shootings in America?

I feel a deep empathy, sadness, and connection as a fellow mama. No one wants to fear for the lives of their kids. Parenting is hard enough without this torment.

What do you think American moms worry about that you don't?

GUNS! Number one. Also abortion rights and paid leave. It’s not simple in UK either, but it’s better. I look at New Zealand, Sweden and Iceland, and see another way. A better way. Mainly female-led. Surprise. Motherhood isn’t for mothers, it’s for humanity. Care should matter! We are all sons and daughters, after all.

Do you think your children are safer than ours?

It’s hard to say. Anything can happen. With wars and global warming, it’s a tricky time on the planet. On the gun violence side I think we are.

Yumi, a mother of two, ages 2 and 7, in Tokyo, Japan

As a parent, is gun violence something you worry about?

I am not worried, because we seldom have incidents in Japan which involve guns.

What do you think about when you hear about school shootings in America?

It really makes me wonder why such things happen in the U.S. I do not really understand why such incidents are often repeated.

What do you think American moms worry about that you don't?

Small children in Japan go out alone, children go to school by themselves. They also do some errands for moms or stay home alone. I have heard that children in the U.S. don't do such things alone since it would be unsafe.

Do you think your children are safer than ours?

Yes. Children in Japan do not have much sense of crisis since they have been brought up in a relatively safe environment. Even if someone pointed a gun at my kids, I don't think they would recognize that the gun is something dangerous.